LITERARY: "Screaming, Crying, Kissing in the Rain" by JC Punzalan

Posted by: April Despi

Date Published: September 9, 2022

Time Published: 5:16 

Category: Prose

Theme: Clinging onto love, even if it was toxic.

Synopsis: The way we loved would be nothing if it didn't hurt.

(Inspired by Taylor Swift's 'The Way I Loved You')

The way we loved was a fire burnt, lightning struck, a wind stilled. A candle’s wax melts down to its wick all too quickly when lit ablaze. It was 3 AM, and I was outside your apartment complex with an umbrella in hand. The rain was pouring, battering me so hard I could feel it shake my hands. It was miserably cold, and my favorite pair of sneakers are ruined under the gunk of mud flooding through the sidewalks. I didn’t care. I needed to see you, I just needed to—even if it was like getting stabbed with a knife. I stood there for what felt like hours, and it probably was. My teeth clattered, my voice was hoarse from shouting, and I was about to leave with nothing to show but red blotches on my face.

The way you loved was a hammer smashing through concrete. You broke that building’s entrance door and sprinted towards me. Water splashed so high from your skips, but you didn’t care. You came to me drenched, because of course you were stupid enough to step into a storm bare-handed. A hug, a sorry, another hug, and I wasn’t sure if it was tears or raindrops slipping down your face. I wanted to scream at you, be mad at you, hate you— Yet I couldn’t. I kissed you instead, ignoring that this rollercoaster we called our love would crash soon.

The way I loved was giving my all, something you never did. I wondered if you think about me nowadays. Would you like to meet my new boyfriend? He was nice, I guess. The kind of guy any girl would want, yet he smiled at a man like me so fondly. I wondered how lucky I was scoring him; he called my mother, acted like my friend, and felt like my home. I’d never not trust him, I’d never curse his name at the crack of dawn, I’d never be neglected by him.

The way he loved was perfect, yet I missed you—how intoxicated I was with you. I missed the lowest of lows and the highest of highs. The feelings I never knew were possible until we were screaming, crying, kissing in the rain.

Picture Link: https://wallpaperaccess.com/rain