Published by: Annika Howie Quizana
Date Published: February 20, 2025
Time Published: 12:04 PM
As proven by people for generations, Filipinos are known to have closely knit families. While many consider this as a blessing, others view it as a curse placed upon them because of the underlying pressure that comes with it. This pressure is one that burdens children to become the provider of the family when they grow up. It may be a widely accepted practice, but it crushes the dreams of young people. For a parent to ask their children for reasonable financial help as they are struggling is one thing but thinking that your kids are forever indebted to reciprocate everything you spent on them is another.
Unfortunately, the concept of relying on children as a retirement plan has long been a common cultural expectation in many Filipino families. At such a young age, a lot of children are informed ahead of time to take on the responsibility of being the family’s main provider once they graduate from college and get employed. In some cases, students are forced to work in a part-time job alongside their studies due to financial needs. A survey conducted by the Commission on Higher Education (CHED) determined that about 216,000 Filipino college students work while studying. [1] The harsh reality about this is that most working students have no choice but to work due to their circumstances. Truth be told, many personal goals and dreams are set aside to carry out their duty as the provider of the family. In relation to this, a study by an insurance company shows that some Filipinos who provide for their aging parents were controlled by the hope of intergenerational financial support. [2]
Some parents believe it’s their right to demand payback from their children for giving them shelter, clothing, and education, which is ironic because every child is entitled to these particular rights. This cultural mindset, which is rooted in traditional values, is exactly the reason why many young people struggle to break free from norms and societal expectations. The idea of kids as a retirement plan stems from the “utang na loob” culture of us Filipinos, which translates to “debt of gratitude.” [3] This is where Filipinos feel the need to pay others back, in most cases, through money or material offerings. Although taking care of your own parents is very important, children tend to feel overwhelmed to make up for their parents’ sacrifices, especially when they are young.
Given how common this cultural trait is, it can even be a privilege when one gets to achieve their dreams beyond the weight of parental pressures, as it allows a child to seek personal growth without any financial obligation constantly bugging them. However, this mentality continues to be ingrained in a lot of parents’ minds that one may even think the only reason why they had kids is to treat their children as a financial investment.
As the next generation of adults, it is upon us to stop normalizing this mindset so that the following generations are unshackled from this toxic cultural trait. Instead of passing your child the responsibility of being a breadwinner, they must be encouraged to make their own decisions and pursue their dreams. Providing for your family should be an act of generosity, not an obligation or duty that one must fulfill. We should view children as unique individuals with their own potential, not as a ticket to a good life. In order to break free from this generational curse, we must break the vicious cycle of treating children as one’s escape from poverty because, at the end of the day, it is every parent’s fundamental responsibility to provide for their children and not the other way around.
REFERENCES:
[1] Ogrimen, R. C. (2024, July 10). Balancing school, work life: the working students in the Philippines. RepublicAsia. https://republicasiamedia.com/.../balancing-school-work.../
[2] Afinidad-Bernardo, D. R. (2025, February 6). Parents with kids as retirement plan: Sharon Cuneta weighs in. Philstar Global. https://www.philstar.com/.../parents-kids-retirement.../amp
[3] Tuazon, A. C. (n.d.). Understanding ‘utang na loob’. INQUIRER.net. https://opinion.inquirer.net/.../understanding-utang-na-loob
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