Tuesday, October 13, 2020

LITERARY: "To Love Without An Exception" by Fatima Rigel Ong

In just a blink of an eye, the whole world changes its pace and it seems like it stop. The children lose the glimmer in their eyes, the once crowded and busy city appears like a ghost town and the air is like a poison to everyone. For months, people have been fighting this pandemic, yet it remains strong and signs of defeating it is still a blurry image. Lots of deaths have been filed, frontliners are exhausted and even the government admits that the Philippines isn’t ready for this kind of difficulty. Through this, heroes of education also put their guns up and shield on their side. One of them is teacher Sara, a high school teacher at Latin Lyceum.

Everyday she goes to school and teaches the kids, braving the danger she comes across the streets.  She could’ve worked from home but her wifi hasn’t been installed yet. Everyday is always the same and everything is on repeat. She walks from home then she waits for the bus, commutes then goes to school and meet her kids online. The scenario she witnesses feels like a cycle. Sometimes when she is waiting for the bus to arrive she would wonder what’s going inside the homeless man’s head at the sidewalk and how he manages in this crisis. She feels like crying sometimes because she badly wants to help him but she doesn’t have the power to do so.

When she goes to school, she diligently does her work and help the kids by lessening their burdens because she knows how much the whole situation is stressing them. She gives them homeworks that can easily be done and reminds them everyday about school stuff and gives them an ample amount of time to prepare their activities. When they also meet she tries her best to lighten up their mood so her students would not feel awkward and give them a homey feeling and to also establish a bond with them.

Sara is happy with her students because they seemed to enjoy her subject so much and they’re close to her heart. However, an unexpected news that her co-teacher sends her breaks her heart. It was a series of screenshots of conversations of some of her students, cursing her multiple times and one of them even wishes her to die. The chat items circulates on the internet and she does not hear a word from her students after the incident. She felt betrayed and she questions her credibility and asks herself where she has gone wrong. She works tirelessly and yet her students still curse her. The school’s administrator learns about this and suspends the students for a week. They also face more disciplinary actions.

After a week the students who has done her wrong sends her a letter of apology and tried to appease her but she couldn't respond to it wholeheartedly. There’s still pain and a bit of anger in her heart and she knows that. However, as a teacher she also knows that it’s her responsibility to understand her students and make them realize the mistakes they make and helps them straighten their path. She approaches them nicely and tells them honestly how she feels one meeting. Those students who wrong her cry and apologize again. They felt humiliated and sorry for what they do. It hurts them seeing their teacher on the verge of tears  in front of them; it’s like making their mother cry. The students don’t worry about how much it will reflect on their report card, they’re more worried about how to gain their teacher’s trust again. So for months they have been diligent students, when their teacher celebrated her birthday, each one of them writes a poem for her and sings for her online.  Sara, has never been happier when they surprise her. They are her hope and only family because she isn't able to make a family of her own in her younger years because she devotes her life to teaching.

All is forgotten, Sara and her students got along well again and this time, no  more talks behind each other’s backs. She is a picture of a loving mother to her students, she is always there when they needed someone to talk to so they grow more attached to her. But just like what other people say, “fate has its own humor”. Sara logged in into their online class again and meet her students. They are ecstatic when they saw her because almost two weeks had passed when they had their last section. The students have their modules in their hand already but Sara told them to put it down because that day they had another lesson to discuss, the most important one.

“Class, this time won’t tackle a new lesson. I’m tired of talking, this time I want to listen to you too. I want you to tell what you’ve learned from me,” Sara said. Her top students enumerated all the lessons she taught them, from lesson 1 down to the last, then another student stated some life lessons she embarked on them. Then the student who wished for her to die before came next. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes but she held it back.

“Ma’am, first of all, I want to say sorry again for the things I said before. I still haven’t forgiven myself for being that stupid. I know it was just words but it deeply pierced your heart when you learned about it. You treated us as your own kids yet we hurt you and broke your trust. Thank you for loving us despite what happened. You still cared for us, you are our mom,” she said as the tears in her eyes started to fall. She wiped some of it away then continued, “I don’t know how to repay you for your kindness. You taught me how to be true to myself when I chose to be somebody else, you helped find who I am. So thank you, thank you very much ma’am. You truly are my hero.”

Sara wiped her tears away too as they continued. She listened to them up until the last student. When they finished all of them were already weeping, touched by what everyone had said. Sara cleared her throat and spoke.

“Kids, I’m happy to hear you learned so much from me. I also want to clarify that I no longer harbor any ill feeling towards any of you. Please learn to forgive yourself and accept the fact that sometimes we make mistakes and hurt other people even though we didn’t intend to. Class, in the next future we’ll go separate ways so I want you to live your life to the fullest, make sure you won’t have any what ifs in the end and please remember me my love. Always remember that I love you with all my heart,” she said then ended their session after some tearful goodbyes.

Another week passed, Sara’s students waited to meet her again but a news from one of their subject teachers  shook their world. None of them believed it at first then all of them broke down. Their teacher passed away due to COVID 19 and none of them saw this coming. A scheduled e-mail was sent to them the day of their class, it was a picture of all of them put in one frame together and a very short note at the end that said, “ I Love You my kids.”

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