Cartoon by: Althea Rosseine O. Bombasi
Published by: Kate Ashley R. Lumictin
Date Published: December 25, 2023
Time Published: 4:37 PM
Category: Personal Essay
Subject: Misogyny
If a house is a theater, the spotlight deserves to be on the mother. Her scenes contain doing the laundry, cooking three meals a day, cleaning the dishes, changing the baby’s diaper while providing comfort throughout the whole family and people would holler “It’s her role to fulfill”. Yet, during the ensuing chaos of this household drama, why do we save the compliments for guys who fill these essential roles? These particular kinds of tasks ought to be acknowledged as a portion of the life script, instead of an aspect that deserves to be honored.
In a two-edged standard society, we stay in, there are plenty of factors that are not addressed properly, like how ladies that are be feminist are referred to as a “red flag” for being one and how a man is praised for calling himself as one [1]. A man doing something women often do on a daily basis gets applauded, even for something so simple that just happens to get caught on camera, it goes trending just because it is done by a man. Simple, yet so big of a deal? Even other women themselves publicly praise men, specifically their ex-husbands just because they provide support for their child, when it is literally written in the law [2]. People are shocked to hear that a man changes his own child’s diaper not only that but even carrying his own child is shocking and mind-blowing to others and that made them label the mother of the child “lazy” [3]. Why? Because in their eyes, it was supposed to be her. Her, carrying the crying child panicking and all crazy, she should be the one struggling to wipe, clean, and change her child’s diaper, not her husband, just her.
Philosophers proposed that a woman's perception of various domestic responsibilities becomes stronger when she enters a kitchen, where she may see dishes as "to be washed" or a fridge as "to be stocked." Over the course of time, these minor changes build up to big differences in who does what. A man may just witness dishes in a sink or a half-empty fridge, but without feeling the ease or experiencing the accompanying psychological need that women do [4]. This means that women mostly experience the urge to clean, wash or basically just do everything. Because society marks them as the ones that work in the kitchen in the first place. The vast majority of girls experienced hearing the words or the phrase “Go make me a sandwich” especially from the boys in the gaming community. A far too accepted sexist epithet that is insulting to women and often said by those boys. The ones who sit all day, playing in front of their monitors and computer. Yet, praised and normalized even labeled as “cool” by others.
It is so biased, on how a man is called “responsible” for taking care of his child. It is really a parent’s responsibility in the first place. It is a role, a role of a parent. A parent does not just work in a specific field. A parent does not just provide money, shelter, or necessities. They do not just work themself all day long and come home to rest. They also provide the care that a child needs. Both parents could work in the field of their choice and still take care of their child and do the chores. A study conducted by Sultanpur and Khan (2021) stated that women are not acknowledged as equal partners, either inside or outside their residences in our male-dominated society. They are usually perceived to be helpless and reliant on males. Just like how a man is praised for doing basic house chores. A woman? unhailed, unappreciated, and undervalued. That is the problem. It is normal for women but different for men.
In summary, societal norms tend to cast a shadow on women's unnoticed devotion in all household tasks. It is necessary to get past the boundaries caused by gender discrimination and understand and cherish the hours of effort that both parties undertake to fulfill the numerous duties that stitches up the everyday fabric of household life. Together we can overcome the obligation to match our views merely with those of others who share the same sex, with the comprehension that sincere reverence should go beyond these lines. By adopting a wide-ranging viewpoint on shared functions within families, we can build an atmosphere that honors and commemorates the efforts of every person, no matter their gender.
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