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Published by: Jean Ashley Lugod
Date Published: February 14, 2025
Time Published: 6:16 PM
[Flash fiction: Trabble]
“I shot an angel, with my father’s rifle”
Unbeknownst to the naked eye, a hint of gunpowder clung in the air until it settles within my eye to which it was reminded of the bullet that was planted between the nerves inside my neck. I supposed I wasn’t the only one who carried such a thing because forcefully or not—everyone has a bullet in their neck.
However, what was it like again? Must be the old days, right? Those old days where one chooses which to pick between guns and rifles. Cavalry and violence. A time where the clock finally ticks, survival goes on a simple choice: to plead or oppose; to live or die. If somehow, somehow given a choice, would you be the one who’s standing, with trembling hands gripping the cold steel while waiting for such a miracle to pull the trigger? Or would you be the one falling onto your knees, terrified between the gap of the bulleted hole of the barrel?
They say it is the right of the beholder to abandon a rifle, but not until it gets to you, consumes you, until it gets passed from one another. Like a chain of bullets, only to be broken once fired. Bittersweet speaking, I haven’t abandoned it yet as I already bear the weight of the thing without the knowledge being passed on me. And so when I accidentally pulled the trigger, I realized that the chain doesn’t shatter—it only grows heavier.
When I did, the angel had fallen. Its wings that were once pure and white, now have been drenched and almost solidified by the bloodbath, folding on its fragile state. Even if it was an accident, what difference did it make? The sorrowful gaze of the angel and the sound of its labored breath, pushed the bullet in my neck deeper to sink in that the weight hadn't shifted; it didn’t get lighter nor a burden to carry, but rather something to indicate that it already fits right on my hands.
So, what would you be rather? To stand tall or to fall on your knees? Either of which to choose, it doesn’t matter as the bullet will always find its way to you—carving a way to go through one’s flesh, hopes, and dreams, leaving a sound louder than the mark that it drowns everything else.
REFERENCES:
XXXTENTACION. (2022, June 9). WingRiddenAngel (Official Audio). YouTube.
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