CLASSIFICATION: Prose
THEME: Silent love, Letting go
SYNOPSIS: You grew up with me and slowly my heart leaned towards you, yet you never felt the same.
'Your face is so peaceful, how can I live without you?' That was the question I always ask myself whenever I was looking at you–sleeping peacefully. I wish nothing would change between us.
We were doing all the things together, you're my childhood friend, my best friend, my partner-in-crime, you're always with me to all of my firsts and so as for me to you. You know all of my secrets; I know yours. I could comfortably move with you around and you were yourself with me. I wish we could stay like this until we get old.
"You're so stubborn! I can go there alone!" I bit the insides of my cheek ‘cause you were so cute when you were mad. Though I was persistent so you just let me go with you. And now you were so loud and couldn’t stop your mouth talking and talking, telling me what happened to you earlier. It just seemed like a while ago, you didn't want me to go with you, ha. I laughed it off a bit. I wish you would still be like that after you find out.
"How I wish I’m also like her. She's so gorgeous!" she said out of her insecurity. "Ha, don't say that! You're beautiful on your own!" You were gorgeous for me. "He! You're only saying that because we're best of friends!" That is her favorite line. She was beautiful, really! Many guys tried to court her but they were always thinking we had a relationship! I wish we really had.
I witnessed your breakdowns and that was the most painful part for me. Seeing you fall, and couldn't do anything. That was your first heartbreak and the last thing I could think of is to make you cry, but that boy easily did that to you. I swore that I would teach that guy a lesson! But you just stopped me and said it wasn't worth it anymore. I wish I could protect you always.
We were now looking at the sky, you were so fond of looking at them. We were happy together and we laughed at each other when a fly tried to get inside of my mouth. But you suddenly went silent. I got worried. I didn't like to see you like that.
"Is there anything bothering you?" I asked her immediately. "I am so afraid." You turned your face away from me so I could not see your eyes pooling with tears.
"Why? Something happened?" I carefully asked. "I think we're going back to each other." I... didn't know what to say. I thought you were hurt, but you were saying that now.
.
"He said, he's sorry for what he had done to me. He even cried. And I can't stand seeing him like that, I really love him." But I love you too. "I could see in his eyes that he's really sorry for everything and ready to fix everything with me. He said he love me." she paused a bit, smiling. "And I still love him." She turned her face on me and I could see in her eyes that she was so in love. I wished that I was the cause.
.
I wish you would find out, but I guess there was no reason for you to know. You were happy with him and as long as you were happy that was enough for me.
I wish we stayed what we were until we got old, but there was now someone who will be with you to fulfill that.
I wish you would still tell me what happened to your day and rant until you get tired, but now there was someone who would listen to you and be with you.
I wish we had that relationship like what others assumed, but now you were happily in a relationship, and not with me.
I wish I could always protect you, but now he was the one who would do that.
I guess that was the end for us. Everything would change now. I was crying every night, blaming myself for not letting you know about my feelings. I couldn't love someone the way I loved you.
"Hey! This is it! Be there at my wedding ha!" she happily announced. "Of... Of course! I'm so happy for you!" And after our dinner, tears betrayed me asf lowed through my cheeks. It really hurt.
It was so hard, but this was the right thing to do– to let you go. I couldn't imagine that... that you would spend the rest of your life with someone else. We were childhood friends, we were best friends, we were partner-in-crime, you were my girl, and you were my love. You were with me with all of your firsts, but I was not the one with all of your ends.
I was glad that you were happy with him.
Published by: Rhina Ruth T. Galano
Date Published: November 23, 2021
Time Published: 8:00 pm
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