Published by: Jean Ashley Lugod
Date Published: April 8, 2025
Time Published: 6:45 PM
What if, running purely by a trick of fate, undesired chance,
Comes the day that you just so happen to bump into me,
Tell me, would you recall the history of what you've done?
Even though I believed nothing could ever last forever,
What began from a single form of love and attraction,
Irreparably changed me, into thinking maybe it could be.
Unwilling to cut open the heart, yet bared it on the sleeves,
Too softened by the ideals of romance to get a second notice,
To all the ways that can harm, building up on every moment.
Though I admit I was a foolish existence when it came to it,
I never imagined the kind of ruin this would actually bring.
One I hoped differently; after all, I did love you once before.
Throat still raw from pouring salt on a festering wound,
The only way I knew how, that stopped the emptiness,
In the guise of healing all but what should have mattered.
Choosing to save myself, rather than what it is we had.
Now I know better, looking back with clinical detachment.
To the love I once believed yet always forced me down,
I won't be around as a corpse, playing doctor, any longer.
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